Rice cereal, trip to the aquarium, and carpal tunnel

That's a random title isn't it? A lot has been going on at the Crane household. We went to Gabbie's four month appointment and her doc gave us the okay to try rice cereal if she was interested. Was she ever! I was a little surprised at how well she was able to get the whole eating with her tongue thing down and she gobbled her rice cereal right up. Now whenever we sit down to eat as a family, she watches us eat our "grown up" food intently and sometimes opens her mouth as if we are supposed to share with her. Sorry baby! Not quite time for that milestone yet! She is even making yummy sounds when we feed her her cereal. I love my little girl!

Recently some darling girls in my ward/neighborhood invited us along to go to the aquarium in Sandy. I didn't think Gabbie would enjoy what was going on but she was alert and looked at all the fish and colors. I ended up buying a yearly pass because it is $8 to go once and $16 for a season pass. I figured you go twice and the pass is paid for plus it will give us something to do during the doldrums of winter. The aquarium is pretty cute and actually pretty good considering the fact we live in Utah. I look forward to doing more things like this with Gabbie and teaching her about the big world she lives in. She loves to get out and socialize and look at everything around her.

Lastly, Todd had to have surgery on his right hand for Carpal Tunnel. YUCK! It is acutally a very simple procedure but it's left him sore and unable to adequately use his hand for a while. For a few days he couldn't hold Gabbie and he had to wear a splint that he was supposed to keep elevated for a couple of days. His hand has been hurting him for quite a while and I am glad we got the surgery done for him so he is able to work without pain. The medication he has to take to prevent it from throbbing makes him really loopy and sometimes he'll say some pretty funny things to me and I have to ask him if he has any idea what he just said. Poor guy!

8 years and loving it!

Today Todd and I celebrate 8 years of marriage together. I can't believe how time has flown by! Every year we usually have a tradition of going to a local bed and breakfast but Gabbie has made us change our plans for the first time we've been together. Yesterday we went to Tiburon for dinner and then we saw The Proposal. Such a cute movie! It was great to be out together alone without our baby even though she was the topic of most of our conversations.

I am so thankful I have Todd as my husband. I received a lot of negative feedback from a lot of people when I married him because I was only 19. Looking back on it now, even though I was very young, Todd is exactly what I needed at that point in my life. I was not at a postive place at the time and I needed Todd to help me get through some tough issues and be on my own and learn to accept myself and my life. He has been an incredible companion and I am thankful to have lived with him through some very hard times. The hardest times in our marriage have been associated with the greatest blessings we have experienced and it has been well worth it to have gone through some painful things to become the couple we are today.

I feel safe in my relationship with Todd and I've never had that in any relationship I've had in my life. Todd is unjudgmental, patient, and loving. He is faithful to me and to our beliefs and he is my hero. At one point Todd had to choose between friends and the world vs. family and the gospel and he bravely chose his family and our religious beliefs. Doing so he has become such an incredible person and I admire him for turning his back on poisonous influences and he has tried dilligently to do what is right and constantly looks for ways to improve his life and those around him.

I am thankful he and I now have the greatest little gift in our lives we could ever ask for. Gabbie is now the finishing piece to our family and she is the glue that holds our family unit together. I am glad I get to share this with Todd and I look forward to many, many more years of great adventures with him.

I love you Todd! Here's to a great 8 years of marriage!

Once upon a time...

Todd and I have been working on a nightly bedtime routine with Gabbie and one of the things we do each night is read her a story. When I tell family and friends this, they laugh at us because usually babies won't pay attention. Not Gabbie! When we read to her she looks at all the pictures and she tries to read along with her loud cooing and ahhing. Todd was putting Gabbie to sleep the other night and I thought this was a very sweet sight to see.

What we've been up to!

July always seems to be the busiest month for us next to December. We are always doing something and are always visiting family. Things have been going well and our little girl is growing and developing more and more each day. I think it's safe to say that she is well out of the colic phase and now is she pleasant to be around ALL DAY. She is so fun and so sweet and cute and I am loving every moment of being her mother. She is starting to roll over but can't quite roll over completely and gets really, really mad. Maybe I should feel bad for her but Todd and I just laugh at her when she gets frustrated. She is also getting better at grasping toys and then of course, putting them in her mouth. Recently she has fallen in love with this totally ugly parrot rattle from a tummy time mat we have for her and she is constantly wanting to hold it and chew on it. There are very few times that she is without that stupid parrot but it just melts my heart when she falls asleep grasping it.

We also recently introduced her to my parent's swimming pool. I thought for sure this summer she would be way too little to go to the pool but since she enjoys taking baths so much, we thought we'd stick her little feet in. She was a little unsure of what to do but pretty soon her little legs were kicking but she held on to her daddy for dear life.

We've also been teaching Gabbie how to go to sleep on her own and it's finally been nice for her to do it by herself and not rely on mommy and daddy to make her do it every night. Our pediatrician and many, many friends have recommended a book called, "Solving your child's sleep problems" by Richard Ferber. His method is similar to what is commonly referred to as "crying it out" but it is not as scary or cruel to the baby and parents. We have been working on it for about a week and a half and Gabbie only cried one night for a while and now she is going to sleep on her own. HALLELUJAH! Let's face it, I love rocking my baby to sleep but when I would put her down every night, she'd wake up screaming and so the problem was that she preferred sleeping in my arms as compared to her crib-that doesn't exactly fly in the long run! Learning to go to sleep on her own is teaching her healthy habits and teaching her to be independent and I am glad that we've done it!

Todd, Gabbie and I joined our friends/cousins Clint and Kelly at our cabin for the 24th. As mentioned in a previous post, my cousin married Todd's best friend and we've been inseparable ever since. Recently Clint was diagnosed with a form of cancer called Acute Lymphoblastic Leukemia and has been fighting very hard to beat this illness. All things considering, he looks great but is still very weak and can't do much. He and his wife requested that we join them on the 24th and we had a great time. We spent the night laughing, playing games, and watching our favorite movies. It was great to see them cut loose and enjoy themselves.

We had a number of invitations to go to several 24th of July parades and we ended up not going to a single one. Darn! I hate parades! I really, really fail to see what makes them so entertaining. Honestly, fun for me is not sitting in hot weather, inhaling second hand smoke from someone's cigarette, and the stench of horse poop. I don't think it's fun to watch the board of trustees from Zion's Bank wave from a convertible car or to see 50,000 marching bands from all the high schools in Utah. People argue that parades are fun for kids because they get candy. WHAT? If that's the reason for making your kid sit in 100+ degree weather, I'll just buy 5 bags of candy and hide it around the house for them to find. I remember this one time (one of the only times I went to a parade when I was little) that candy was being thrown and yes, I was excited. A big piece of candy was thrown my way and as I scrambled to get it, some fat guy sitting in a lawn chair, grabbed it as I was crawling towards it. He totally saw me coming and not like he needed it! I was six and I remember thinking, "You big jerk!". Let's just be honest, who really cares about all the pageant royalties from each city in Utah, who the SLC chief of police is, and clowns. What is it about these people that makes us ewww and ahhh? Can they fly or blast razor beams out of their eyes? I don't think so! Count me out as far as parades go.

Todd has been super busy with work and with scouts. I admire him for his constant willingness to help everyone out and his genuine concern for others. He would do anything for anyone. He is a great father and he loves his daughter tremendously.

I have been busy being a mom and trying to get back to my pre-pregnancy weight. I have been working out like mad and have been on Weight Watchers and it's paying off! Weight watchers works! I've done it before and I like it because it doesn't require you to do anything drastic. You learn how to make good eating choices and don't have to eat anything weird.

I try to get out a lot and mingle and visit with friends in my neighborhood and friends close by. I am so thankful I have so many great people to call upon to keep me busy. I think if I were to sit at home every day and watch soap operas, I would get very, very depressed. On the days I'm not with friends, Gabbie and I have been taking advantage of our Netflix subscription and have been on a musical kick. Yes, I'm a geek but they are sooo good! I just watched Hello Dolly for the first time and I loved it! I am also addicted to "So you think you can dance" on TV. That show is so awesome! I still kick myself every time for quitting dance. I should have followed my heart and pursued what I love the most instead of getting a college degree in something I felt I had to go into and I didn't like. The choreography on that show is amazing and Todd laughs at me because sometimes it touches me so much that I cry. I'm weird and I'm okay with it!

Lately we've been getting a lot of door to door sales people and I am sooo sick of it. Every time the person is selling something I don't want or need and I'm tired of people trying to talk me into a magazine subscription or raffle tickets or something stupid so Todd and I got a no soliciting sign for our front door. My original idea was going to say something like this:
"No soliciting. We've found God, we gave at the office, and we won't buy what you're selling so don't waste your time. " But, that's kind of tacky and rude so we just bought a nice, simple sign to hang up. Now the real test will be if those super agressive sales people will abide by the sign and leave us alone!

4th of July

Todd and I watching fireworks

Me and my two sisters I never had: Brooklyn and Michelle
(they're actually my cousins and I adore them!)

Rio the family dog enjoying fireworks with the family

I just thought this was funny. My brother was trying to be sexy while putting on sunblock.

Yep! I'm one of THOSE moms. I had to put Gabbie in a 4th of July outfit.

The fourth of July is one of my favorite holidays. I love Utah summers, BBQ's, swimming and enjoying family and friends. This year, we had a very busy 4th of July weekend. For the first time in 4 years, all of Todd's brothers and their families were in town and we spent a lot of time with them. We had family pictures taken and it was great to visit with my brothers, sisters, and their kids. We spent Sunday afternoon with them at a Crane Family BBQ with two families they grew up with and it was fun to sit and visit with all our loved ones.

On the fourth we went up to spend time with my family in Layton. My favorite uncle and his family flew up from St. George and we spent the day swimming in my parent's pool, barbecuing, and then watching fireworks. My little brother even spent the entire day with us and I was so excited because that is a rare occurence!

With so much excitement this past weekend, it was a little overwhelming for Gabbie. Gabbie is a very social baby and loves people. Because this past weekend was so busy meeting new cousins and family members it really threw her little schedule off and she was pretty irritable and fussy and wouldn't take her daily naps. She was cranky and as a result-I was too! She's been able to get back in the swing of things and now she is back to her regular schedule.

Even though we had a very long and very exhausting weekend, we loved being around our great families. We spent the entire weekend laughing and talking and I am sad it is over. I tend to be a very reflective individual and as I was sitting with my family on the 4th watching fireworks, I am very thankful for the family I was born into and the family I married into. I am very blessed to have such incredible people in my life, faults and all, and in the end family is truly what matters the most.

Growing like a weed

Coming home for the 1st time

9 weeks old-what happened?

Gabbie had her two month check up today and she is definitely a very different baby from when we brought her home for the first time. When she was born she weighed 6 lbs 14 oz and now she is almost 10 lbs. She recently outgrew some of her pajamas and it made me a little sad to have had to put them away in a box. We are trying to enjoy every moment with her that we can before she is 18 and out of the house.

We initially thought she had acid reflux but lo and behold! She is colicky. YAY! The good news is is that she does sleep at night and we are more than half way through this stage. It's hard to get frustrated because when she smiles, she melts both of our hearts. We love her so much it almost hurts!

Lessons from life I want to teach Gabbie

This post is more serious and emotional in nature and contains a lot of self disclosure. I've had this on my mind for a long time and I thought it might be good for me to write about it. I in no way mean this blog to feel bad for myself or for any of you to pity me, I just think it is healthy to deal with tough situations in a good way and I have learned some great things from having had lived through some painful times.

Ever since Gabbie was born when I sit up with her in the wee hours of the morning, I look into her beautiful face and I think about things I want to teach her and also worry about the things she will have to go through in this life. No doubt she will receive her fair share of struggles and trials and the best thing I can do as a mother is to teach her how to deal with them in a healthy way. I believe one of my greatest strengths is resiliency and the ability to adapt to change: good or bad. In recent years I have learned how to look at a bad situation and wonder what positive lesson I can learn from it. Doing so has helped me count my blessings and also see what great strengthening qualities I have obtained from going through something hard. There is one part of my life I have never understood why I have had to go through until now.

Growing up, I was bullied. Not just once or twice but many, many times. I look back now and wonder, was I really that weak or that big of a loser for so many people to pick on? Even some of my so called "friends" turned their backs on me from time to time. These experiences have had some long term effects on me and I am beginning to realize now that I am who I am in many characteristics because I endured bullying. Growing up I was severely depressed and had very low self-esteem. I took what the bullies said to heart and it was painful. How in the world could junior high and high school kids be so mean? I have always tried to a kind person and it just baffles me that anyone could treat someone with such disrespect and abuse. Even when I was a cheerleader, the bullying continued and probably was even more relentless at that time. People usually wouldn't think that would happen to a cheerleader due to the stereotype but it's true! Those girls were very mean and petty and knowing what I do now, I would have not participated in that activity. When I entered high school I did establish some great, close friendships with people whom I still love and adore (AKA Annalise and Jessica). They helped me tremendously and I am thankful I had them when I was at my lowest. When I left high school I went to a college no one else was going to and when Todd came into my life, I was over joyed! Now it was my time to move ahead and even today I am convinced Todd is the perfect one for me.

For years I have looked back on the experiences I went through with certain people and my heart would be full of hurt and anger. I would constantly wonder why it was necessary for me to go through years of bullying. Finally for the first time the other night, I realized why. During those times when I did not have a ton of people I could call friends or trust, I developed early on a great relationship with my parents and also in the being I believe is God. None of them ever left me and were a great support system. I developed a lot of faith and maturity for someone my age and as a result, have had great opportunities for growth. I have also learned to deal with tough times in healthy ways that are not self-destructive nor abusive of the rights of others. I have learned compassion and love for the under dog and most of all, I have learned that I am a good person who is capable of being loved and deserving of friendship. I hope to teach Gabbie, as my parents did, that she is beautiful inside and out, that her dad and I will always, always accept her for who she is and our home is a safe haven from the world. I also hope to teach her resiliency. In the eyes of hard times, you can choose to be a victim or you can choose to learn something positive from it. If you choose the latter, you will grow more and gain more self esteem instead of wallowing in self pity. I also hope to teach her to be a nice person. I want her to accept people regardless of what they look like or if they are total dorks at school. I want her to know that she has a Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ who love her and care about her. I want to teach her to be assertive and stick up for herself. I've always been thin skinned but I have learned to hold my own ground and stand up for myself so I don't get walked all over and it's felt amazing! I can't control what people will do or say to Gabbie but I can teach her to feel good about herself, trust Todd and I and her Heavenly Father and do unto others as she would have them do to her. Life is tough but when we look at painful situations as opportunities for self-improvement, I speak from experience that they are fully worth it!

Random Gabbie Pics

Since my day to day routine isn't anything to brag about (i.e. holding Gabbie, feeding Gabbie, finally getting ready for the day at 2 pm, etc) I thought I'd post a few pictures of her from the last few weeks.

New Moon

I'm so excited!!!! Who's with me?

http://vids.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=vids.individual&videoid=58185785

AHHHHHHHH!!!!

Catching up!

SHEESH! It feels like it's been forever since I've written. Life with a baby is busy and I spend most of my day holding her, playing with her, or catching up on sleep. For the past couple of weeks, Gabbie has been super fussy and it's been pretty frustrating because we haven't been able to figure out what she needs or wants. Finally I decided to take her to see her doctor and our little girl has acid reflux! We feel so bad! Every time after I feed her, she screams and screams and nothing helps. Her doctor prescribed her some baby Pepcid AC and I hope it works! Fussy babies aren't fun to be around as much as you love them.

We do have some good news! Gabbie is smiling and she looks so darn cute. She started smiling at 4 weeks-yes, you read that right, 4 weeks and now she is slowly becoming very attentive and interactive when you talk to her.

Gabbie is doing pretty well at sleeping through the night and I don't feel like a zombie anymore. According to every baby book I've read and Gabbie's doctor, we can start working on a sleep schedule when she's 3 months and I can't wait. I just hope she's not a stubborn little diva and won't budge when we try to help her learn good habits. The lack of sleep has been the hardest part and biggest adjustment we've had to make and you're never prepared for how tired you are in the first couple of weeks.

We love her with all our hearts and enjoy making her smile.

So you think you can dance!

In another life, I was a big time dancer and at times I am very sad I quit. If I had continued, I would have loved to have tried out for this show (only to have been cut, but hey!). I love, love, love it! Since now our lives are consumed by our little baby girl, the TV has become "date night" and this show will be our best friend for the summer. Anyone else watch this as obsessively as I do?

Gabbie's Blessing Day

Gabbie was blessed on Saturday, May 9th 2009. We decided to hold the blessing in our clubhouse to make it a more intimate setting and we had about 30 family members show up. My uncle has always blessed all his children in his home and I've always wanted to carry on the tradition with my family. That way, no one ever feels like they have to stand up and give the obligatory testimony about being thankful to be new parents. Quite frankly, that isn't our style and secondly, there are tons of families in my ward who are having trouble getting pregnant and I did not want to make them feel bad by going up and saying how blessed I am. I know when we were having trouble getting pregnant, I used to get kind of mad when people did that! I guess I am brat! :)

Todd did a wonderful job of blessing our little girl. He blessed her to always remember the significance of her name and always look to God for her strength. He told her that many people love her very much and she will always have people to turn to for help but ultimately she would need to look to the Savior for help and guidance. He told her she would someday be an advocate for those searching for the gospel and she would help many in their struggle for a testimony in Jesus Christ. Gabbie was blessed with the opportunity to marry in the temple someday and have a family and she was blessed with good health and a long, happy life if she lived righteously. She was also told to have patience with her parents as we have had patience with her. I hope and pray that Gabbie has a happy, long life and that we can teach her right and give her many happy memories.

Gabbie wore the blessing dress I wore when I was blessed as a baby and so that was very fun and meaningful and maybe someday her daughters will also wear the same dress to carry on the tradition. Gabbie is still pretty small and the dress was huge on her but she looked beautiful and behaved pretty well for a 3 1/2 week old baby!

We love you Gabbie and are so thankful you are a part of our family!

Andrea, Dustin, and Avery Miller

This is such great news that I had to post something on my blog about it. I have a dear, close friend that I went to college with and have stayed tight with ever since. My buddy Andrea have gone through a lot together and we have become very close because it took us both a long while to have a family. Andrea and I both went through miscarriages together and cried over our disappointments. Andrea and her sweet husband finally felt prompted to look into adoption through LDS Family Services and shortly after, a dear birth mother picked them to be the parents of her child. It's been such a great experience to watch Andrea as her dream unfolded before her eyes. Finally she was receiving her chance to become the thing she wanted to be the most, a mother! She and her hubby had suffered for far to long and her time was long overdue. I have watched as their daughter finally joined their family and I have seen Andrea become an excellent mother and I have seen her life shine with happiness as her little Avery has entered their home.

Yesterday Todd and I had the awesome opportunity to witness Andrea, Dustin, and Avery be sealed together for eternity in the Draper Temple. I have never been to a family sealing and by far, it was one of the most touching things I have been a part of. To see a little family be sealed for time and all eternity was one of the most beautiful things I have witnessed. Finally Andrea and Dustin are whole and now Avery can receive the blessings of an eternal family. I hope someday little Avery realizes how lucky she is! She was blessed into a home where she was wanted dearly, where she is loved, where she will always be free from abuse and neglect, and where she will be taught the gospel. I am so thankful we have temples and for the plan of our Heavenly Father. This life is truly all about families and I am thankful to have witnessed something so sweet and precious. I am so happy for the Millers and that they are finally a family forever!

Life with a baby

It's amazing how much you can love your child. Already Gabbie has both of us wrapped tightly around her little finger and both of us would do anything for her. Gabbie is a typical newborn sleeping about 3 hours and then wanting to eat and then not sleeping at night. I know we will get used to this and this is only temporary so I'm trusting what everyone keeps telling us that things will get better. Already there are a ton of things I love about her and I know as she gets older, we will find more and more things about her that will make us smile.

What I love about Gabbie:
-She loves to cuddle and be held very tight and close to me.
-When she wakes up in the morning, she and I have staring contests. I love looking into her big blue eyes.
-She hates to fart and poop and makes the funniest sounds when she is pushing
-She HAS to always have something to suck on and always has to have her hands by her face.
-Most often, when I'm changing her diaper, she pees all over me
-She smiles in her sleep and I think she is trying to smile at us sometimes
-I love kissing and holding her
-I love her skinny, little spindly body
-She loves to be close to me all the time. This can be hard to get things done so I just put her in a sling across my chest and she falls right asleep.

Life is busy, hectic, and tiring but life with a baby is well worth it! Todd has been amazing to both me and Gabbie and he honestly deserves the husband of the year award. He is always helping out around the house, runs errands, holds Gabbie when I need a break and even gets up at night to change her. He is wonderful and I am so thankful we have him!

Getting the hang of it!

Thank you all for your great suggestions and feedback. It's weird, everyday I wake up with a renewed sense of dedication and commitment to getting breastfeeding down and for the past three days, it's worked! Gabbie is doing great and getting the hang of it and I am definitely more at ease with the whole thing. Thank goodness! No one tells you how frustrating the process can be!

We're doing great and we're all getting used to the new schedule Gabbie has brought to our lives. She sleeps pretty well throughout the night and since she has started to master breastfeeding, life is so much easier! WHEW! We're still pretty tired but that's to be expected. Todd goes back to work next week and I am a tad nervous about being alone but Gabbie and I will just deal with it and develop our own schedules together so we can make it work. We are totally in love with our little girl and are glad she is ours!

Question for all you mothers

I realize that Gabbie has only been alive since Tuesday, but I daresay, breastfeeding is the hardest thing to do! I went to classes before she was born and met with a lactation specialist in the hospital and Gabbie and I still can't get it down. She latches on fine, and the milk factory is producing but it's almost like she hates breastfeeding. She fights with me and will turn her head away when I try to feed her. In a worried and desperate attempt to make sure her belly is full, I have pumped and then fed her a bottle. I know lactation specialists and some pediatrician's would say that is a no no, but what am I supposed to do? She takes a bottle soooo much better and sleeps like an angel when I pump as opposed to breast feeding an hour later she is cranky and still won't feed. What do I do? I wanted so badly to breast feed but everytime I try, Gabbie is mad and I am exhausted. Suggestions anyone?

On a lighter note, everything else is GREAT! When she sleeps, she sleeps and she is so beautiful and observant of everything around her. I love staring into her eyes when she is awake and I am glad to have her. I feel great and I have been up and about cleaning and moving around fine without any pain. Hopefully I will be able to go back to kick boxing in a matter of time when I am fully healed!

Please, suggestions, comfort, reassurance from anyone! I am sad this isn't working out and I am physically tired after trying so hard to get this down.

She's Here!

Gabriella Ray Crane made her entrance into the world on Tuesday, 4/14/2009. She weighed 6 lbs, 4 oz, and was 19 inches long. She has her mommy's fair skin and blonde hair and her daddy's facial features. She has 10 fingers and 10 toes and we are so in love with her!

At 10:30 on Monday night, I started having irregular contractions and by 12:30 am, they were then regular, intense, and 5 minutes a part. Todd was so excited the entire time everything was progressing that he got up, showered, put our suit case in the car, and watched me as I was lying on the floor, withering in pain. Since my contractions were regular and not too long a part, we headed up to Alta View Hospital. I was dilated to a 4 1/2 and was immediately admitted and everything went underway.

I had to wait about 1 1/2 hours for my epidural and I tell you, I have a new appreciation and respect for those women who do natural birth. What troopers! During my contractions, I wanted to die and there is no way a big whimp like me could handle the process of natural birth. Holy crap! Once I got the epidural, the process was smooth. My doctor had to break my water because I wasn't dilating very quickly and once he did, I dilated to a 10 in an hour and after pushing for 45 minutes, Gabbie came into this world. Todd and I were both crying and we are so thankful for this opportunity to be a mom and a dad.

I'm healing well and I don't have any pain. Gabbie is eating well and she is such a mellow, sweet baby. She scored an 8 on her Apgar test and she passed her hearing test. We get to come home tomorrow and I am excited to be in the comforts of our home, with our little one.

Here are some pictures of her big arrival, ENJOY!